This weekend Tim and I tried some new activities and communities in Charlotte, places to connect, serve, and have fun. Exhausting, but rewarding all the same.

1. Pet Therapy. Taza and I went (with a volunteer group) to a nearby retirement home to share a little fluffy love. She was a big hit of course and behaved herself quite well. I'm grateful for a chance to connect with some old folks, to slow down and listen for a moment, to meet people who live so close but whose life experience is so different from mine.

2. Latin Birthday Party. Our Mexican neighbors invited us to their 1-yr-old's birthday party. Having experienced this type of event before, we knew already that it wouldn't start on time, would be 99% about adults, and would last until the wee hours of the morning. Unfortunately we had plans for the evening, so we just stopped by at 4:30 to drop off a gift. The party was supposed to start at 4, but there was barely a hint that it was going to happen. I imagine people showed up at 6 or 7. Anyway, we were glad to chat for a moment and so honored to be invited into this event. The mom brought by some cake and spaghetti the next day. I hope we can get to know them better in the future.

3. Contra Dancing. My college friend Julie gathered a small group and we spent a thrilling evening doing what Tim describes as "Pride and Prejudice meets line dancing" (Tim, of course, is very familiar with the movie and knows the dancing well). What fun! We were all pretty dizzy and exhausted by the end, but I definitely want to go back in July. The community there was perhaps the most welcoming I've ever experienced, and the facial expressions we saw were reason enough to attend on their own.

4. Pops in the Park. How have I never participated in this Charlotte tradition? The symphony plays on an outdoor stage on Sunday nights in the summer and the whole city (well, at least a certain subcategory) shows up to enjoy picnics on blankets while the sun goes down. It happened to rain a little before the show, so the weather cooled down enough to make breathing fairly easy. I went with Marty and Emily and for a few moments, just sat in awe of the gift that they are to me. I'm so grateful that they are willing to share their amazing friendship and open their lives to me. Plus they have precious children.

I told Tim last week that I really need a day off. At first I didn't understand why he was laughing at me. Then I remembered that I don't even have a job. Oops. I've been satisfyingly busy but also sometimes covet a day to pretend I have no responsibilities or goals. We'll see.

My 120-lb Neapolitan Mastiff has a problem with dog aggression. Not good. She snaps at other people's dogs and forces them to hang out in a corner when they visit our house. With Taza it's worse. A few times I thought we were going to lose her. Last weekend, she picked up Taza (11 lbs) and shook her in the air.  Now you see what I mean by "problem."

Luckily we're back in the United States of Everything is Available and Possible if You're Willing to Pay, and after meeting with six different dog trainers and behavior modification specialists, I think we've found a good solution. Surprisingly it wasn't the most expensive option, although this dang dog is getting pricier by the day (mango pit extraction surgery, international flights, etc).

Next week she will be boarding with a pack of German Shepherds and getting some practice in friendliness. Or at least socialization. I'm pretty sure that getting her at 3 weeks (yes, she was tragically pitiful) has something to do with her inability to be nice to other dogs. Then in late July we'll be joining a group class with both Ellie and Taza. By the end of this, I expect that Ellie will not only be non-aggressive but that they also will be super obedient. Yay!

That's what I'm hoping for at least. Every time I met with a trainer, I realized how well we actually do have it-- calm, people-pleasing dogs that seem willing to obey most of the time. I don't think we're very far off from what I'm looking for. We'll see....

Couldn't be more excited about the new folks who moved in across the street last Thursday. They're a married couple about our age without kids and with two dogs, one smaller than Taza (Pomeranian) and one larger than Ellie (Great Dane). Ironically their Dane is named Nellie. They came over for dinner last night and we really enjoyed getting to know them some.

As I continue to pray for positive relationships in our own neighborhood, I find God opening new doors all over the place. It feels good. Besides just trying to be friendly, here are some of the plans I have for meeting people around here:

• joined a gym 3 minutes away instead of the (cheaper) YMCA 10 minutes away
• volunteering down the road-- Taza and I are scheduled to start "dog therapy" at the retirement home on Saturday!
• we're hoping to repeat the neighborhood cookout in July
• I'm attending my first book club tonight at the International House and hoping to make it Wednesday for Spanish Conversation Hour

Let me know if you have any good ideas to add to my list!

Tuesday night we threw ourselves a homecoming party. Really it was more to get to know better the new folks we've been running into-- hair stylists, coworkers, neighbors, etc. As we re-enter Charlotte and find our new lives here, Tim and I find ourselves pursuing different interests. One thing we definitely share is a desire to connect more deeply with old friends and branch out to engage in meaningful new friendships as well, particularly with people who aren't so much like us.

In the end we had 25 people show up for a low-key cookout. Nine of them were from our church, mostly people we met since we've been home and with whom we've been meeting biweekly for a book discussion. Of the rest, 13 were neighbors, 3 were college friends, and 3 were coworkers. We were thrilled to see them all.

The neighbors, really, were the most exciting part and the inspiration for the party to begin with (not to say that I don't love the other folks!). I've written before about our wildly fun next door neighbors, whose friends have recently moved in across the street. In addition to that crowd, we had a couple who just moved here in the fall from Atlanta and a Mexican family with 4 kids. Of course we were delighted to see the Mexican family at the party and get a chance to practice our Spanish (which is better than their English). The ecclectic and interesting group was everything I hoped for and a lot more.

As it turned out, we sort of had two parties-- one at 7, which included the majority of the people and the food. As those folks were leaving, the next door neighbor crowd showed up. It was a gift to have them at that point, when we could sit down and chat more about their lives and interests. They gave us a copy of their CD, which turned out to be the best white-boy rap I've heard (no, seriously, it was pretty good). They hung around until Tim kicked them out at 12. Sweet.

I've probably said more than enough by now, but in general, it was a super encouraging evening for us. We're so eager to dive in relationally right here where we live, and I think we're off to a good start.

*While I'm thinking about the neighbors, here's some neighborhood news to give you a picture of our street:

• The Mexican family tried to raise rabbits to eat. They have about 6 domestic rabbits (black and white) that hop around the neighborhood, mostly in their own front yard. Unfortunately they say they can't seem to catch them. So long dinner, hello dog food. Honestly, watching these guys hop around is the highlight of my day.
• Our next door neighbors invited another friend to live with them, but since they don't have a third bedroom, he calls the tool shed home. Way to be resourceful.
• While walking around inviting people, we discovered that one of our neighbors is a dog groomer with two full-sized poodles. Can't wait to see if we can get a deal!! She has her screened in porch all set up as her dog salon.
• Because most of our street is either rental properties or newly built fancy dancy homes, most of the residents are new. That makes it easier to make friends in one sense. I think we've been here the longest of everyone except one older couple with an angel statue in their front yard.

Hope to have more neighborly news later. I wish I were a columnist (or could write like one). Don't you think this would make some good material?

Books on my list so far:

• The Soloist Steve Lopez
• Outliers Malcolm Gladwell
• Collected Works Flannery O'Connor
• The God Delusion Richard Dawkins
• The Quiet American Graham Greene
• The Audacity of Hope Barak Obama
• Island Beneath the Sea Isabel Allende
• The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest Steig Larsson
• Jesus for President Shane Claiborne
• Women, Food, and God Geneen Roth

Of course those are supposed to come after some serious work on my seminary courses. Bah. 

Today I gave my last exam (except make-ups).

Well I tried at least. When the kids were still throwing books and screaming at each other while I was trying to read the standardized test instructions, I lost my cool. For me, that doesn't mean yelling and cussing them out the way it does for some teachers. It means hyperventilating. I fled the room in a panic and was fortunate that the principal was in the hallway.

Three times in two months. Something is not right.

Is it really them or is it me? Hard to say. I wonder if my emotions aren't a little too close to the surface, perhaps an indicator that I'm experiencing more transition stress or reverse culture shock than would be easily apparent.

Several of my coworkers reminded me that I can't let the kids get to me and certainly can't let them see that they got to me. They say it in a friendly and consoling voice, and I know they want to make me feel better as well as give me advice. All I feel is frustrated that I can't do that. It doesn't feel like a choice over which I have any control. It just happens, often coming out of nowhere, and then I'm left trying to pick up the pieces. With all this practice, I'm getting the hang of that finally.

Off to the beach when Tim gets off of work. I think I deserve a vacation!