My interview last week for an end-of-year Spanish position wasn't an interview per say because the principal can't do interviews until he has "the list" from HR. Hopefully this week I'll be back for a "real" one. I did schedule an interview with another principal for a job starting in the fall. It's hard to know how confident or not to be about all of this. Honestly, I feel like I'm extremely qualified, but then again, all of Charlotte seems to be hurting economically and I just wonder....

Everyone we talk to has been laid off or had financial set-backs at work. It feels dark in some ways, but no one seems too disillusioned by it actually. Maybe the shock has passed.

Pobrecito Timoteo is sick with the worst sore throat of his life. We bit the bullet yesterday and splurged on a whole slew of throat remedies: lemons and honey for tea, other tea, special throat lozenges, regular ol' Halls, salt for gargling salt water, zinc tablets. I'm sure I'm forgetting something.

Charlotte is feeling surprisingly normal. Every time we sit down for a meal with someone, it seems like it has only been a few months since we were last in that same spot. I love it. What I really love are my friends. It has been so good just to be with them. I don't think I realized how much I had missed that. Two and a half years is a long time.

My mom and brother came to visit this week, too. It was such a blessing to have help setting up my house, and sitting down for dinner with the two of them felt right. I'm hopeful that both of them can be frequent weekend guests in the years to come!

Our neighborhood is continuing in its process of gentrification. They are knocking down little houses and building monstrosities, but they architects seems to be doing a good job of keeping the same bungalow-type style. It's actually not that bad. And certainly good for our house value. It's been fun getting to know all of our old haunts and new ones, and I'm looking forward to getting to know my actual neighbors soon. They're all new people since we left (mostly renters on our end of the street).

We've hit Chick-fil-a (a little bit of a disappointment) but are trying to hold off on indulging in all our old favorites. People from our church have graciously been providing meals for us, and I'd say we've both lost a few pounds in the last week! Definitely a surprise. I think it's partly because we're too busy to snack.

Off to church in two hours. I'm seriously intimidated. It will be the first time seeing so many people after our long adventure in Peru. How many times can I say, "Oh my gosh! It's so good to see you!" Of course I really will mean it, but still.... The other scary part is that I imagine a good chunk of our congregation (including our pastor) is new. We have a lot of new friends to meet. Whew.

Enough updates for now. Still busy, busy, busy and hoping things will calm down this week so that I can digest what's going on.

Goodbye, Harris Teeter! I have two new favorite grocery stores since returning to Charlotte: Trader Joe's and the Giant Penny. They couldn't be more different, but I'm pretty stoked about both.

I suppose many of you already know about Trader Joe's. While we were gone it moved into Charlotte and won the hearts and wallets of all our friends. And now mine. As if it weren't cool enough already, let me tell you about their customer service.

My mom and I went in the other day, and she picked up about $30 of groceries. When we left, we realized that Tim had the car keys in a nearby store. We tucked the groceries under the the front of the car and we went to go find Tim. When he returned 5 minutes later, they were stolen! Can you believe it? I hope it was someone who needed the food badly. When we went in to ask at Trader Joe's customer service if perhaps someone had turned in some groceries (yeah, right), they offered to replace them!

The whole thing was probably a good lesson for me. I definitely did not think putting the groceries under the car was a good idea, but I tried to tell myself that I was being paranoid and unreasonable after living in a culture with more delinquency. It appears that was not the case. Note to self: Charlotte is not a utopia.

So on to the Giant Penny. This place is an independent grocery store 1 mile from my house. It's the kind of spot that has a sign on the door about not allowing concealed weapons or bicycles inside. And it sells Hannah's Pickled Pigs Feet. We went in search of chicken feet/backs/necks for dog food (they're on a raw food diet because of Taza's allergies-- look it up! very interesting!). If anywhere in Charlotte would sell them, it was sure to be the Giant Penny!

Lo and behold, the Giant Penny was overflowing with weird animal parts. Chicken feet turned out to be prohibitively expensive-- $1.69/lb.-- since our two doggies consume almost 3 lbs. a day between the two of them. Backs and necks were a steal, though, and after chatting with the butcher, we worked out a great Giant Penny bargain. Yesterday I went and picked up a 40 lb. box of chicken backs for $20. That gets Ellie through 16 days of raw chicken goodness and lands our dog food budget at about $45 a month (roughly the same as in Peru). Pretty good for 145 lbs of doggies! Oh, the Giant Penny. Just make sure you lock your car when you go in.

Here's what we've been up to in the last few days:

• beginning to unload some storage stuff
• visiting Trader Joe's for the first time (love it!)
• scoping out the estate and yard sales
• eating some delicious chicken chili from Mark and Jess
• bundling up on an air mattress
• organizing our kitchen with my mom (thanks!)
• preliminary interview for an end-of-year job for me
• seeing friends
• learning to drive again

So far so good. I'm busier than I ever expected to be but having fun. I keep waking up early and not being able to get back to sleep because I'm so excited for the day! Hopefully that will calm down soon because I'm getting very sleeeeeeeepy. 

The number one thing I've noticed over the last few days is that America has become obsessed with organic and green. Two and a half years ago all of these organic/green products weren't available, and those weren't the key words for selling any and everything. It's good to see this evolution, although I'm curious to see what happens next.

More stories to tell but I'm exhausted. I hope this schedule will slow down soon so that I can do a little more processing.

We're home! We left the SAM guest house in Lima at 6 am Sunday morning and arrived at the Finks' house in Charlotte at 2 am Monday morning. There was some inclement weather in there and for a moment we thought we might be stuck in Ft. Lauderdale until Tuesday (today). Whew.

It has been so so so fun seeing our friends and their children, and I know we have many more great reunions in the next few weeks. Outside of the house is a little weird-- gray, cold, quiet, vast-- but inside is warm and wonderful, full of catching up and thinking forward, 2 year old smiles and hot showers.

From the delayed planes, serious turbulence, first Target trip, and long to-do list, I've been filled with peace and hope in a surprising way. I know you must be praying for me because this is so far from my normal reaction. Thank you. I feel like I am riding on grace.

By the way, keep praying! Both for our emotional state in this transition and for our jobs. We both have interviews on Thursday that we hope could lead to employment. Mine is actually for a new opening as an end-of-year Spanish teacher at a nearby school.

More later, but I'll leave you some highlights from my "what I've noticed" list:

• an apologetic waitress
• lots of Vera Bradley and Coach
• big napkins
• ethnic diversity
• automated everything
• it's freeeeeezing!
• big houses far apart
• 9 kinds of Brita pitchers to choose from (I gave up... I'll have to come back to that another day)

Here we are in the Ft. Lauderdale airport, waiting at Chili's for some lunch/dinner. Ironic because Lima is covered in Chili's. And because I don't even like Chili's. Anyway, I'm sure it won't be the first anticlimax.

My dad told me to make sure I write down all the things that stick out to me at first before they start to be normal again. Here's what I've noticed so far: Americans are really funny. All day long people have been making witty comments all around me. They seem happier, which surprised me. Maybe it's just a perk of working in an airport? :-)

We had a little hiccup going through customs and almost got some notation on our passports about contraband. Eek. Other than that no problems (and that one worked out fine actually). We still have to fly to Atlanta and then Charlotte tonight. Miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep.

We also got to share meals with our Lima friends-- both JJ and Amber and John and Heather. They have been a huge support to us and dear friends over the last two and a half years. I'm sad to leave them behind and am scheming now for how to make it to Syria (JJ and Amber's next embassy post) and California (John and Heather's US home) in the next few years.

Leaving for Ft. Lauderdale in 9 hours! See you soon!

Still dark outside. Tim just took Ellie and Taza off for their flight to Lima, where Continental will check their crates and make sure they're ready to fly on Sunday. We're leaving at 3 pm.

It's been a tough few days, partly because of the stress of moving to another continent and world, but mostly because we're sad to leave our friends here. One thing that has caught me off guard is that they seem to be making a big deal out of us leaving (mostly involving feeding us lots of sweets!). Since we've only been here since last July, I didn't expect that. I'm glad they did. I think their attention and intention is helping me to process better. I need to know that this is a big deal, leaving these relationships as much as this place.

This bed, these floors, this sunshine-- they've all become so familiar to me. I wonder if "home" will feel like home or if it will be another new place to explore and adjust to. Two and a half years doesn't seem like all that long, but I know we are not the same people we were when we woke up early on Halloween to haul our life belongings to the airport and set off for an exotic adventure.

Tim laughs about how he's getting old (at 28). He played Ultimate Frisbee a few weeks ago and nearly left crippled. He says his body is tired. I don't see that, but I do see a new maturity in him that has grown deep and wide, a new passion for people and God, a new clarity about who he is and what he wants in life. If you talk to him long enough to listen, I think you will be surprised.

What will be the joys and struggles of the next week, month, or year? Where are we going? I don't know. I've spent half my life waiting and working for this season that ends today. Now what? Everything I dreamed of doing in my life is done. I'm 28 and have a long road left ahead of me. I'm never felt lost before, and my mind (if not my heart) knows I'm not now, but it's strange not to see beyond the curve in the road.

[One more jungle cockroach killed. Millions to go. Nope, I won't miss that.]

This week I find myself meditating on Psalm 138:8--
I love that it is an affirmation but also a prayer. Sure, but still not. I'm glad to know that God has purposes for me even when I don't know what they are. And I'm glad to know that I belong to Him. I commit my life and spirit into His hands, fix my heart on loving and serving Him, and trust Him to take care of the rest.

1. being 90 minutes from my mom and brother
2. Charlotte friends
3. Cantina 1511
4. the public library
5. the movie theater
6. being able to buy pretty much whatever I need or want (in terms of accessibility, not finances!)
7. having options like a dishwasher, dryer, and hot water
8. meeting my new nephews and baby Walt
9. my house
10. family vacations on Little Diamond Island
11. King of Kings
12. a fresh start
13. cool weather
14. clean floors
15. carpets

You may notice this list is shorter than the last (things I'll miss). I feel a little lost about going home right now. I'm sure it will be exciting when I get there, but today it just feels like a loss and an end.

Please keep us in your prayers over the next few days! Tomorrow afternoon we fly to Lima and then Sunday to Charlotte. There's plenty of stress to be avoided in that time.

1. friends in Pucallpa
2. friends in Lima
3. speaking Spanish all the time
4. being in a place where I can live more simply (like without hot water)
5. cheap public transportation/ not having to drive
6. living inside a park
7. working with people who share my values and passions
8. cantaloupe juice
9. watermelon juice
10. guanábana juice
11. my juice shop and the folks who work there
12. knowing where to go to buy random things like pot handles or rolls of foam
13. seeing Shipibo women in town in their traditional dress
14. walking the dogs without leashes
15. pool weather 365 days/year
16. an economy where I can easily afford house help
17. apple bananas
18. slow-paced living
19. a relationship-oriented society
20. being away from the draw of consumerism
21. Wednesday night prayer meeting
22. knowing my neighbors (hopefully I can make that happen in Charlotte too)
23. generating less trash
24. tropical flowers and birds
25. being able to hang my clothes to dry
26. aguaje shambos (pumpkin pie popsicles?)
27. chifles (fresh salty fried banana chips)
28. buying $5 seconds of all the softest and most expensive T-shirts in the world
29. feeling like it's okay to "make do" 
30. torrential rain

Andrew's visit couldn't have been timed more perfectly, and certainly not due to planning on anyone's part. I wouldn't have imagined that a visitor two weeks before our departure would have been advantageous (although since it was Andrew, I knew it wouldn't be a burden either). Nonetheless, I'm deeply grateful for the way it worked out.

Of course I enjoyed catching up with him and hanging out, but what I want to mention now is how helpful his presence was as we begin this transition process. Andrew lived in Syria for 3 years and has done this re-entry thing before us. It was so good to be able to hear about his experience and ask him questions about it, both the transition itself and in general how things are in the US these days (You have to pay for incoming cell phone calls?! What?!).

I know that when we get home there will be plenty of people who really aren't interested in my story. They'll hear me out as I mention that I've been working abroad 2.5 yrs, but that's about it. It was a gift to have a friend here who could both listen to that story and understand it.

It's amazing how God knows my needs and provides for them in the most surprising ways. I look forward to seeing more of that provision as we throw ourselves on His mercy over the next few months.

Monday after the SAM Peru Field Conference we headed a few hours south of Lima with our friend Andrew for a daytrip to Pisco and Ica (where the earthquake occurred when we first arrived in Peru).

We first went to the Islas Ballestas, which they call the poor man's Galapagos. I believe it's the place closest to the equator where you can see penguins. The islands are one of the largest producers of guano in the world and are covered with thousands of birds and sea lions.

Afterwards we went to Huacachina, an oasis just outside of Ica, and spent the afternoon riding a dune buggy in the desert and sand boarding (or sand sledding in my case).

Our friend Andrew is visiting us and our mutual friends JJ and Amber, so we've been hanging out in Lima with the three of them this weekend. What a gift. Today we went down to Barranco for lunch, and something about being there seemed too good to be true-- sitting out on the deck of this super restaurant laughing my head off with good friends. Love it.

This week we've been in Lima for our annual SAM Peru field conference. It's always a great time to connect with others, hear about the awesome work that people are doing, and be challenged and encouraged by our keynote speaker (in English!). I love this community, and I love a scheduled time to get away for renewal.

Yesterday the women got together to share some about how they've been and what's going on in their lives. Lots of tears of course and great stories. When it was my turn, I had nothing to say. Is that possible? As much of a talker as I am, I promise, I couldn't come up with one thing to share. I certainly surprised myself.

As the conference comes to an end, everyone is digesting what they've learned and giving some responses to it. Me? I'm totally ashamed to say it, but I don't really feel like I've learned anything. Unusual to say the least. Part of me feels disappointed. Another part relieved, as if I don't have space right now to have a new breakthrough in my life.

People keep asking how I'm doing, expecting that I would be stressed out or excited or something I guess about our imminent return to Charlotte, stepping into an English-speaking country for the first time in 2.5 years. Nope. Nothin'. I feel neutral, planar. Not sad to leave, happy but not excited necessarily about getting home. I can't seem to answer questions about what I'm most excited to leave or get home to.

What the heck is going on with me? I'm happy. I feel close to God. I'm learning new things. I feel loved by the community around me (here and at home). Tim and I are in a great season of our marriage. I feel peace throughout-- body, soul, and spirit. Actually, now that I think of, what's wrong with me that this feels so abnormal?!

Emotional stability has never been my strong point, and that's okay with me. I'm grateful for the roller coaster of tears and laughter, the way it makes me cling to the Lord and know Him deeply. I receive my passion and tenderness as a gift from Him and not a curse. I'm okay here, too, in this week where I'm surprisingly unmovable. Just a little baffled.

I wonder if this is some kind of denial about all that's about to happen, but honestly, after the last 15 years of introspection, counseling, and self-help books, I'm fairly self-aware. Denial seems unlikely given the total absence of hints about something underneath. Maybe God is giving me this season of peace in anticipation of what we're about to go though. Maybe I've already worked through a lot of it in the last 10 months in Pucallpa. Maybe there's another answer hidden in God. To Be Determined.

Keep me in your prayers as I seek to be present to what God is doing in my life!

Recently I've been thinking a lot about hospitality, generosity, and being part of a community that loves and supports one another. Partly it's because we spent the weekend with our friends JJ and Amber, whose lives and words always challenge me in that regard. Also because of a few instances recently that reminded me that most people don't do crazy things like loan their cars out for 6 weeks.

Being part of a community that does just that has transformed who I am. It's a demonstration of the extravagant love of Christ already received. It's also a proclamation of detachment from things and attachment to heaven.

JJ sent us this video today. This guy wears his hair and lives out his faith in a way that is different than mine. So does JJ actually. I'm coming to appreciate those differences deeply as they stretch and grow me. It reminds me that I need people in my life whose strengths reveal my weaknesses and whose ideas and lives inspire me. I'm praying that God will open the door for relationships like that in Charlotte, too.

I ran into this verse again on Friday, and it brought back a flood of memories from late 2008 and early 2009. To say that was a hard season would be an understatement. God laid this verse on my life last November, and I clung desperately to its promises of redemptive pain for the next six months or so.

As I look back on those trials, I can say with confidence that the testing of my faith developed perseverance and that God stretched and grew me in maturity. Honestly I wouldn't do it again, but I'm glad for what I've gained. I think we've made a difference in our time here in Peru, but the biggest difference is the one God made in me.